of poodles and mailboxes and bungees

Follow on from this post

I would like to state, for the inquisitive of mind and bored of life, several things need to be considered before trying to reduce unsolicited mailshot with poodles, bungees, and mailboxes.

First, it's an absolute truth that large poodles cannot fit through letter boxes, no matter how far back you stretch the bungee.

Secondly, poodles can be angry little bastards.

Third, there is no doggy chew in the world that will entice a previously launched poodle to get back into the damn slingshot.


And so it is fair to state that trying to give a postie the shock of a lifetime is not simply a function of canine velocity. Well, it is, but it's a one off unless you has an adequate supply of ignorant poodles and it's a new postman every day who hasn't been informed by depot that "The occupier" at number 4 will mash an irritated barking bogbrush against the door glass when you approach with the latest important information on double glazing.

Although that particular offer was rather useful after the damage from the first attempt, oh the irony of it all.

I think a rethink is in order, possibly some other form of animal could be launched in a decisive effort to reduce the amount of trees that are dying in the name of breakdown recovery for only 20 pence per day.

Perhaps a snake.